My Family

My Family

Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Am I a mean mum?

Am I a mean mum?

I was having a conversation the other day with a mum at the school who thought i was a bit of a  mean mum as i put my girls to bed at 7pm every night. Where as I happen to think they're wrong to be leaving their kids up til all hours,past 10pm sometimes. What do you think?

My girls are aged 4 and 8 years old and have always had a set bedtime of 7pm on a school night. Yes they may mess about for an hour or so,as most kids will but they are normaly asleep by 8pm and then fresh and ready to get up about 7:30am. I believe my kids are much happier after having a good nights sleep. If my kids were getting up at 5am cus they were'nt tired then yes i would think about letting them stay up a little later but for now,they seem quite happy. Do you think i'm being mean?

I think letting kids stay up til they say they wanna go bed isn't the way it should be, were in charge , not them! How is a child supposed to do well at school when they've had very little sleep and go to school tired?

I understand that everyone has different ways of bringing up their kids but surely kids need a good nights sleep. What time do you put your children too bed??

Sorry for the Rant but it really annoyed me so i thought why not get it off my chest and ask you lot,what you think. Please feel free to leave a comment,i won't bite, Promise x

14 comments:

  1. not mean at all! mine go to bed at 7 too. helps them concentrate at school if they get a proper nights sleep!

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  2. Thanks hun,im so happy to hear that i'm not the only one who thinks 7pm isnt too early x Thats cheered me up a bit xxx

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  3. Your definitely not mean at all. I have always had set bedtimes for my boys and even now they are 13 ad 10 they still have early bedtimes!! Eldest goes at 9pm and youngest at 8pm except on a Monday night when they do scouts and don't get to bed until about 9.45ish!! Boy are they grumpy the next day. Also you need some time to yourself to switch off and relax :)

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  4. Aw thats like my eldest she has Brownies on a thursday night so goes to bed at about 8pm but thats the only night thats different,weekends i do let them stay up and watch a film as a treat which they love.Being a mum is so hard sometimes,so once my 3 are in bed i need a nice snack and drink to relax for a few hours before we start all over again x

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  5. my youngest is now 17, they always had bedtimes, it did them no harm, they were refreshed for school and it also gave time to myself and hubby to wind down.On weekends they stayed up later and even now they go to bed at a reasonable time as they have to get up for work and college(buts thats there choice)and i am pleased they are been sensible. You are not mean, your sensible and kids need routines, so well done you x

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  6. You are not being mean, you are being a sensible parent. Kids need boundaries in order to feel secure and they need a good night's sleep. This doesn't even begin to touch on the fact that you need some time for yourself too. My boys are all in bed by 8 on a school night and are allowed to stay up a bit later on Friday nights. Stick to your guns and don't be swayed by other people's opinions. If it works for them to allow their kids to stay up late then good for them. What's good for the gander isn't always good for the goose!

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  7. Children need bedtimes at a decent hour. You seem so apologetic that you are being a parent. I feel it is mild child abuse to let your child stay up to all hours. When I was a child we had bedtimes... what you may call early now but I call age appropriate. Children are still growing and their brains are developing, they need far more sleep than we do. My children start going to bed at 6pm (1 year and 2 years) and 6:30 (4 years), 7pm (6 years), 7:15pm (8 years) and 7:30 (9 years). Yep thats all six! They need the boundries and time to repair and grow, we need time to do the housework and have a little grown up time. I don't think your a mean Mummy!!

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  8. I dont see anything mean in that my daughter who's 8 goes to bed at 8pm on school night although shes usually in bed at 7 with a dvd on for an hour or she reads for an hour but its strict 8pm lights out!
    I dont understand some parents who let they're kids stay up till they want its not good for them they need they're sleep to be able to concentrate in school!

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  9. I agree with you completely, at 8 they still need about 10 hours of sleep, my 7yo goes to besd at 6.30 because he has a strory every night, I leave him aty 7pm and he knows he can read for half an hour, but sleep time is 7.30 - 8 pm. When he's up too late he is very grumpy and very naughty so obviously he needs to be in bed at that time. Good for you for setting and sticking to that routine, all kids need it, but many don't get routines and boundaries. You carry on as you are, you're doing a fab job.

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  10. Thank You all for your comments,i feel much beter about it now and i shall stick to it,i really should learn not to listen to what soem people say.My kids will thank me one day,when they do well in school and grow up to get good jobs x Long time a way i know but their future matters to me x

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  11. I don't think your a mean mum either but I am really envious of all you whose children do go to bed. My lad has never been a good sleeper and I refuse to use drugs to get him to sleep. As a single mum I would kill for some me time. If he goes to bed at 7pm he awake and ready for the next day at 4am in the morning

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  12. You are absolutely not a mean mum. I am a firm believer of early bedtimes and also the need for children to have get into a routine. my two boys,8 and 6 go to bed at 7pm. i dont really extend that for the very light evenings, because come winter and dark nights its going to cause a lot a trouble sending them to but earlier.

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  13. lol you are no way mean! My kids are now 11, 13 and 16 and half 10 is the LATEST for them so for a younger kid earlier is deffo better! I remember my youngest being moody for a couple of weeks...we took him off the junk food and cooked from scratch which helped...but then I made him have a week of earlier nights and hey-presto back to his normal bubbly self!
    Kids brains and moods work better on more sleep...oh and this will make you laugh! My 16 year old walks to school with his friend, one day I said "does Charlie always wear that beany hat?" and Dean said to me "only on the way to school..he said if his brain stays warm he can concentrate and get better marks" I was so glad to see my son's friends being as sensible as possible but it didn't half make me laugh!

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  14. I think that you are not a mean Mum, you are a Mum who gives your children routine and structure. My daughter used to be a teacher before she got ill and said that she could tell the children who hadnt had enough sleep and that it badly affected their ability to learn. And furthermore children who have regular patterns and routines at an early age are always the most contented in my experience. Furthermore, who are other parents to judge anyone elses capabilities as a parent - we should each do what we feel is best for our own children at the time.

    Honora Livesey @hgl2510on Twitter

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